I was reminded recently that some people are still angry at me about what
they call 'my negative views on relationships.' Very sensitive territory for
most people. They do not want to know the facts about their relationship.

Someone else reminded me that it took years for them to realise, that what
they thought was my negative attitude, was actually their negative attitude.
Now that they have realised what I was attempting to share, they see it is
obvious, and agree with me totally- although still do not feel able to live
that way!

If you go to a zoo you will find most of the animals are neurotic. They
pace. Despite being safe, fed, clean, taken care of, they are not 'happy.'
If you go into the wild and see similar animals you will be surprised at how
different they are from the ones you saw in the zoo.

The difference?: freedom. If we do not feel free we do not feel fulfilled.
Our mind says we want to be safe, secure, and have life predictable, but if
we are not free, we are not happy.
(Not going into to it here - freedom is not so much to do with physical
circumstances, but of the mind.)

If we do not feel free we feel compromised - and that eventually leads to
resentment - which is then projected on to the outside.
If we are not happy we do not want to take responsibility for the fact - we
want to blame something or someone. We do not want to see that maybe the
situation we have put ourselves in is not suitable for us. We hate change.

What we want - is what we want. We want to have the situation the way we
want it. If we have got ourselves into a situation that is not working, we
want to change it - by changing the other person. Stupid. But then, on the
whole, as a species, we are stupid. Very.

To me, I love, love. I love harmony. I love to see people genuinely happy -
especially with each other. Two, or more, people living in love and harmony,
seems to me one of the delights of being a human being.

And how very, very rare that is. How asleep we are - driven by our basic
instincts, and society, to get a mate, and mate. I will not go into it again
here - but the most of the process is chemical driven. How asleep we are.

So is it possible to live in harmony with another person - without
compromise? Absolutely. And it is rare. You have to persevere - with
yourself.

You always draw to yourself the partner you need.
We are always drawing to our selves the circumstance we need to evolve.

Its amazing - when you stop complaining, you stop getting situations to
complain about. We think in terms of cause and effect, and in fact it is the
other way around.

This isn't strictly true, but near enough for this illustration:
When you awaken to the level of consciousness where you no longer need
another person in your life to fill in your gaps, to make you happy, you
will meet someone who no longer needs someone in their life to make them
happy. Lovely.

Suggestion: See if you will take out some time to 'evaluate' your life and
its circumstances, in the most objective way you can. Maybe find a
professional person who can help you see yourself and your circumstances
more clearly. Then see what can be adjusted to bring more happiness to
yourself - and those around you.

Recap. I love people being together in love and harmony. Love it.
What I share about relationships are facts - and they are shared in order to
help to reach this wonderful stage of living in love and harmony. The old
way is not working - and never has. Time for change? At least in attitude.

Keep it light...